Humans do have words, though, and we rely on them, whether we are communicating in conversation or in writing. Because of our intellectual capacity for speech, it is very easy for us to lose touch with our own energy, and to have no idea what we are projecting to the world. However, despite our dependence on language, we do pick up on each other’s energy, whether or not we know it, and this does affect our message. Have you ever heard someone give a speech in a flat, unenthusiastic monotone? No matter how stirring and well written the words, such a speaker would quickly bore his audience to death. Conversely, someone who presents a confident, enthusiastic energy can easily persuade a group of people to go along with the stupidest idea ever conceived. Why? Because, again, their energy exerts an influence on the listeners, whether or not they are aware of it.
Quite often, when I’m working with clients, they have no idea that they’re projecting nervous or weak energy until I point it out to them. They are not in tune with their own energy at all, and so have no idea why their dog is reacting to them in the way he does. But, because dogs communicate primarily with energy, they can read a human in a second. I’m sure you’ve noticed that some people naturally draw dogs to themselves, and others cause dogs to flee on sight. Dogs will always be attracted to calm, assertive energy. Likewise, they will always try to avoid weak, nervous, or unbalanced energy.
To be successful as the Pack Leader—and as a person in general—you need to be mindful of your energy and learn to adjust it when you are not in a calm, assertive mode. Take a moment right now and pay attention to how you’re feeling emotionally, then notice how you’re holding your body. Usually, your body language will reflect your emotional state whether or not you’re aware of it. If you’re feeling nervous or upset at this moment, then your body is probably tense. If you’re feeling insecure, then you are probably hunched over or slouching.
Body language can influence your emotional state, and you can go a long way toward developing calm, assertive energy by being aware of your posture. Stand straight, with your head up, shoulders back, and chest out. Keep both feet flat on the ground. Try to avoid crossing your arms or shoving your hands in your pockets. Breathe deeply and exhale slowly. Stand like this for a few minutes, focusing on your breathing while trying to clear your mind of random thoughts. If it is safe to do so, close your eyes and concentrate on what you can smell and hear. You should find yourself calming down naturally. Remember the feeling and the body language, and then practice being able to move into this mode of being upon demand.
In nature, when a dog in a pack shows excited or unbalanced energy, the entire pack takes it as a warning of impending danger. It is remarkable how quickly a sleeping pack of dogs will fire up and go on high alert when one dog barks, and just as remarkable how quickly they settle down when the Pack Leader determines that there is no threat and goes back into a calm, assertive state. When dealing with your dog, you can see the importance, then, of not going into an unstable energy state. To do so is to send the message that something is wrong. You may not even be aware of the messages you are sending to your dog. This is why it is so important to become aware of your own energy and then take control of it. Until you can control yourself, you cannot control your dog.
